I was feeling frustrated
I was not alone
And I just needed space
But I did not told you so
I chose to keep silence
And there I was, faking that I was fine
A hurricane of anger
But still, I made you a nice breakfast
Two eggs, sunny side up, fresh spinach and ham, with some coffee as well
I did not mention that I was furious
That I had a hurricane that was destroying me from the inside out
It was a hot summer morning
And I was feeling nothing close to warm inside
I became a frostbitten silent man
A speechless entity that was sharing breakfast next to you
I resembled more of a statue than a friend
I just did not wanted to be in me own skin
Mi silences started to speak by themselves
My body was screaming in desperation
I still do not know why I did not explode at that moment
I really wanted to release all of this
It seemed like a good idea to do it so by washing the dishes
And there I was, doing some occupational therapy
Until you noticed that the therapy that I needed was to leave me alone with my thoughts
You hugged me, and I could not hug you back the way I normally do
You left me alone, and I felt relief
I thought I handled it pretty damn good
I did not told you anything negative, nor insulting
I kept my thoughts and anger, and this hell of a hurricane inside of me as usual. As I always do.
This is just some wishful thinking
I wanted to believe that you didn’t notice
But I know you did
I know that you know my anger, and my silences
I forgot that tomorrow was your birthday
And here am I, creating havoc and hurricanes because I do not know any better
Phantasiis 