Choosing our Baggage

man s hand in shallow focus and grayscale photography

“You can only help people feel better about their life, but you cannot take on yourself their struggles because that’s not your load to bear.” I’d like to take a moment to be mindful. Without my own struggles I wouldn’t have the strength to know that I can push through at the end. To begin […]

RX to Self: Please Slow Down

It’s been 12 years since I started this path. Mental illness wasn’t the problem. The struggle was how to regain my confidence and self-esteem after the first onset of symptoms.  In retrospect, I felt like an observer. I was aware of my surroundings and the people around me. The constant struggle to try to belong […]

It’s Not Your Time

It’s a way that sadness manifests itself. A depressive period where you’re trying to make yourself feel anything else other than you. Coping skills are what define you during this moment. Please know that it won’t last forever. What you do during this period might do, however.

Angry With A Choice

Choosing how to react when something happens to you is a skill. I’ve been practicing it during the winter break. It’s knowing that you are in control of your reaction, regardless of the emotion being present. This practice comes handy during times when your only option is to be strong.

Checking-in

Its been a week of poor sleep. I feel as if my circadian rhythm got shifted. I go to bed, and wake up after three hours on average. This is not my usual self. It’s been months since I had an extended period of irregular sleep. It’s the stress. I’ve been dealing with situations since […]

Angry Hurricane – Lyrics

I was feeling frustrated I was not alone And I just needed space But I did not told you so I chose to keep silence And there I was, faking that I was fine A hurricane of anger But still, I made you a nice breakfast Two eggs, sunny side up, fresh spinach and ham, […]

The Question I Ask When I’m Feeling Anxious

I had an anxiety attack while getting ready for my internship. To be honest, I don’t know what triggered it, it just happened. I was doing well for several days. This episode served me as a reminder and a learning experience, too.

The Tree that Cried

The night brought the moonlight Caressing the tree, with patience Erasing the darkness around it Giving it life among the dead A garden full of murdered dreams. Dreams that never came true Dreams that waited an eternity But the eternal has an end here Infinity can stop on this garden The tree couldn’t understand why […]

I Remember

“I remember the blood on the walls. The painting on the wall, it was her, the maiden with the black dress. It was her gaze, her black eyes that looked at me. The red was everywhere. I can’t forget it. I was laying on the floor, anxious and paranoid. And then, I saw hell on […]

Eleven Years Ago: In Retrospect

This past Friday, October 12, was my anniversary. When darkness happened. When the first set of symptoms triggered. When darkness arrived. I was 16 years old. I still wonder why. The only worry I had is to get good grades. Making friends wasn’t necessarily a priority. I was a lonely guy. I didn’t mind. I preferred […]

Outlier

“You’re an outlier,” she told me. “You’ve achieved so much compared to others,” she added. I couldn’t hold it. My eyes started tearing. My voice was cracking. I couldn’t reply to her. I’ve heard that before.

Anxiety’s Cycle – A Reflection

The day and night cycle. For some, days with anxiety feel longer, and for others nights can be unbearable. On the other hand, there’s good days where you wish wouldn’t end. Nights that were too short. Memories that are here to stay, for better or worse. And then, there’s this bittersweet feeling that anxiety will […]