Phantasiis
Unleash your creativity with original modern hip hop instrumentals
Category: Depression
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RX to Self: Please Slow Down
It’s been 12 years since I started this path. Mental illness wasn’t the problem. The struggle was how to regain my confidence and self-esteem after the first onset of symptoms. In retrospect, I felt like an observer. I was aware of my surroundings and the people around me. The constant struggle to try to belong…
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It’s Not Your Time
It’s a way that sadness manifests itself. A depressive period where you’re trying to make yourself feel anything else other than you. Coping skills are what define you during this moment. Please know that it won’t last forever. What you do during this period might do, however.
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Falling Gently
This post is about self-awareness. I was on a funk for some time. Now, things are different because I think about them differently. Its perspective. As I’ve discussed on my last post update, I took a break from digital distractions. I realized in a few days how much time I had to do things that…
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Rx to Self: Part Two
This post is part of a series of experiences on healthcare. From realizations, patient navigation, and the implications of being divided by a border. Symptom: Not having health insurance I didn’t really had an idea how to find, and be able to qualify for health insurance for my grandpa in Mexico. My intention at this…
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Rx to Self: Part One
This post is part of a series of experiences on healthcare. From realizations, patient navigation, and the implications of being divided by a border.
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Angry With A Choice
Choosing how to react when something happens to you is a skill. I’ve been practicing it during the winter break. It’s knowing that you are in control of your reaction, regardless of the emotion being present. This practice comes handy during times when your only option is to be strong.
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Checking-in
Its been a week of poor sleep. I feel as if my circadian rhythm got shifted. I go to bed, and wake up after three hours on average. This is not my usual self. It’s been months since I had an extended period of irregular sleep. It’s the stress. I’ve been dealing with situations since…
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New EP Out Now
Hello, I’ve released a new spoken-word, 11 tracks EP in Spanish. It’s titled “Diferencial: Tuvo un Día Triste” (Differential: He had a sad day). This EP is composed of poems that I wrote, based on love and heartbreak with the point of view of someone who has a mental health condition. It deals with topics…
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Writing About What Hurts
“Write hard and clear about what hurts.” ― Ernest Hemingway This quote has been inside my mind lately. Most of my writing is inspired by what’s hurting and confusing me. The struggles of trying to give meaning to what I can’t explain to someone in person. Explaining how I feel can be problematic. Sometimes, I…
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During the Night
During the night I feel them Coming thirsty Eating my will and confidence A thousand hands Reaching to my mind Touching my fears Tempting with my life A voice speaking “Good night” Until I fall sleep Nightmares rising Waking alone Full of marks and scars Inside my thoughts I’m becoming An outsider of my own…
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I Remember
“I remember the blood on the walls. The painting on the wall, it was her, the maiden with the black dress. It was her gaze, her black eyes that looked at me. The red was everywhere. I can’t forget it. I was laying on the floor, anxious and paranoid. And then, I saw hell on…
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